Film 4 Seeking New and Exciting Ways to Announce that They're Showing Predator 2 and Iron Man this Weekend

Who is hunting who!?!

Schedulers at Film 4 have thrown down the creative gauntlet to the Channel's Promo Gurus demanding they come up with more and more innovative ways to trumpet the screening of two of cinemas biggest 'kahunas' this summer having scheduled screenings of 2008 blockbuster Iron Man and 1990 sequel Predator 2 for consecutive weekends until October.

You get to see him build the Iron Man suit!

"We're thrilled to announce near enough back-to-back showings of these two great films on a regular basis every weekend throughout the warmer months and we're even more excited to see what the guys in the promo department come up with to let the folks at home know exactly when to catch Danny Glover taking on the Predator or Robert Downey Jnr and Gwyneth Paltrow talking over each other" Said spokesperson Alan Cliffe.

Film 4 have already displayed great ingenuity in managing to tie Iron Man to the recent Royal Wedding and have even forged a link between Predator 2  and the killing of Osama Bin Laden. "What is the Predator if not an elaborate metaphor for the hunt for terrorists across an urban landscape?" Asks Cliffe "The Predator has a sort of code of honor, Bin Laden is... was a Muslim... they're kind of the same thing. And don't get me started on that great scene where Bill Paxton and the Hispanic Lady chase the Predator through a crowded subway - Great Action!"

Who is hunting Who!?!

Rumours are already circulating that an upcoming promo will somehow link Predator 2 with the warm-hot weather that we may or may not be enjoying in May - "I don't want to give anything away, but in Predator 2 it's the hottest Summer on record in L.A!  And that can only mean one thing; Danny Glover and his crack team of cops hunting down the best hunter in the galaxy - but who is hunting who? The Hunt is On!"

This time, It's The Urban Jungle!

"... and I actually prefer Iron Man to 2008's The Dark Knight, I mean, it's just more fun! You got Robert Downey Jnr, Gwyneth Paltrow, Terrance Trent D'Arby and then you think it's the end, but Nick Fury turns up and it's Samuel L Jackson  - Oh Man!"

I'm sorry, did I eat your Royale with Cheese? HA HA HA HA H..

Execs at Film 4 see a distinct gap in the market for their season of Great Movies that Cliffe explains thusly "Some people just don't want to watch Later with Jools Holland - I mean, you try but there's just something about it that's so annoying. I think it's the way the audience wait until a couple of seconds after the song has finished before they clap... as if they're real music fans because they wait till the song is fully over... well when you get sick of watching a bunch of people jizz all over Noah and the Whale, then it's good to know that you can always turn over and see the part where Danny Glover is chasing the Predator through an apartment building and they land in an old lady's flat and she is like what!?! Maybe you could flick back to see if anything has improved in Jools Holland but it's probably just him interviewing Bobby Gillespie at a piano really awkwardly but that's ok because now you can turn back and Nick Nolte is hunting the Predator though a meat locker and they've tried to counteract the Predator's heat sea-king vision with infra red lights But Who is Hunting Who?"

Stop... THE ELEVATOR!

Predator 2  and Iron Man are probably showing right now.